I had dinner with two very dear friends of mine last night, and we were feeling a pretty nice glow by the end of the affair. I had repaired to the washroom, and was holed up in a stall trying not to listen to the piped-in crap rock and weak R&B offerings when I was joined by someone else. I was sure that I recognized the boyish falsetto singing along with Des'ree's "powerful, uplifting" song "You Gotta Be", and as my washroom companion listed off all of these things that, according to Des'ree, you gotta be (bad, bold, wiser, hard, strong, tougher, etc) I inquired:
B- "What else you gotta be, big boy?"
Who I thought was S- (silence)
Judging by the silence, the guy doing the duet with Des'ree was not my friend caught in a moment of indulgence, but someone completely foreign to me.
I leaned over to peek under the stall wall to have a look at the shoes.
They were long, white leather numbers. Of course--what else was to be expected of a Des'ree fan?
B- (in my head)"Oh snap."
So I had to think fast, and the best I could come up with was:
B- "Sorry pal! I thought you were someone else--and I thought I was being funny."
Not S- "No problem."
Not S- "You gotta be cool. You gotta be calm. You gotta stay together. All I know, all I know, love will save the day. . . "
I admired him for climbing back in the saddle, and continuing to sing--even though he had missed a few beats earlier; however, I have something I wish to add to Des'ree's list: You gotta keep your trap shut in the men's room--all I know, all I know, is it will save you from getting a shiner.